Counselling

What is self-care?

Self-care is a word that gets bandied about a lot but what is it? It’s something we should all be doing, it’s vital to your wellbeing, helping you live a full life being able to manage stresses and strains and avoid feeling rundown, but what is it?!

It has been defined as taking action to preserve and improve your overall health, physical and mental.  It’s a practice (yes, a practice it will take time to embed it into your life if it’s not something you currently do) and once you master it you will reap the rewards!   It’s about finding something that makes you feel comfortable and relaxed, that takes you away from the pressures of everyday life, even if just for a few minutes a day. 

Sometimes practising self-care might mean having to say no to people, that might be at work or home. Maybe you find you’re over stretched because you can’t say no to helping people.  Try to remember that sometimes it’s ok to say no.

Your physical health is important, do you get enough sleep or take enough exercise? Maybe it’s time to go to bed half an hour earlier, take a short walk on your lunch break or try a new physical challenge.

How about your brain? Do you challenge it? Maybe you could learn a new language or practice mindfulness.  Look at your beliefs and values, exploring them and seeking understanding can help to improve your self-esteem.  Try to adopt a positive mindset.

Try to cultivate self-compassion for yourself.  Have an awareness of your feelings and emotions and try not to beat yourself up because you’re struggling to get yourself out of your bad mood.  Accept that your feelings are not you; your feelings are data and you can choose how you use this information.   

Spend time with supportive friends, who you can share with as equally as they share with you, this is vital to helping you look after yourself.  Your friends can help you feel a sense of belonging and acceptance.  Try to share with them what is really going on for you and encourage them to do the same.

Looking after yourself can lead to feeling of empowerment giving you confidence and a feeling of satisfaction.  Self-care will help you manage mental health problems, however it’s not an instant solution and will take time.

Some things you can do for self-care –

  • Reading
  • Keep a gratitude journal
  • Sharing with a therapist
  • Spend time outdoors
  • Volunteer

Counselling

Biased Perception – What is it?

When our self-esteem is low we tend to notice anything that helps to prove our negative beliefs about ourselves and discount anything that disproves them. We notice anything that we are unhappy with or don’t like. This might range from how we look, how we act or any simple mistakes we might make.

All of these ‘faults’ seem to jump out at us and we end up focussing on all the things we think we’ve done wrong and we don’t notice the things we’ve done well!